Tag Archives: Laughs

’10 Reasons Why I Shouldn’t Have Babies’

This is a hilarious post I just remembered writing while driving in my filthy car this morning… I wrote this almost three years ago at the request of a good friend.  It makes me laugh, sadly, it’s still mostly true, only that’s ok, I will get better at those things that I need to! :)

In response/request to Mari…
1.  I was 20 before I even had a responsibility as big as a purse, I still leave my purse in nearly every store, cubby or refrigerator… let alone the things that should be IN the purse, there are sometimes no way of knowing where my keys are… imagine those skills with an infant…

2.  I am selfish with my time, there are points I cannot stand being around people, any people, and I run and hide where ever I can to get away… pretty sure you can’t do that with a kid…

3.  Kids cry.  I don’t like crying.

4.  I like to poop by myself… and also, the only butt I tolerate wiping is my own.

5.  I make babies cry, see #3. 

6.  My car is typically too dirty to fit any type of a child safety device in.  Its a fend for yourself environment.

7.   I am fidgety, and bounce shake and move constantly, I am pretty sure shaking a baby constantly is bad, or so I’ve heard.

8.  My nutrition for myself consists primarily of ramen noodles, burritos and occasionally some Mac and Cheese, while I am sure most kids would love these options I am pretty sure a growing body needs more than that to stay alive.

9.  I have a very short attention span… not even long enough to sit through a whole movie…

10.   I wouldn’t know how to occupy a child without candy…

The solution to all of these woes… adopting a 12 year old.  They can already wipe themselves, sit upright all by themselves, have their own activities, can order the take out as needed AND can mow the lawn for me!  Sold! :)

Macy

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