This is probably a hormonal pregnancy rant…
This makes me laugh, now… it wasn’t funny all coming at me at once a few months ago! I have since had enough distance to take a gander through some of the comments on a few of the articles posted on my house… One thing I can say, living any type of ‘alternative lifestyle’, whatever that means sure comes with a lot of opinions from people who know very little about it and or have not ever considered the idea but somehow see themselves as the expert on it now that there is a story about it. You HAVE to have very thick skin or just fly completely under the radar… I can personally say it is a lot like when you become pregnant and nearly EVERYONE sees that as an opportunity to tell you exactly how everything needs to be done (no matter how out of date their ‘advice’ is or their gender or experience with kids…) OR as an opportunity to compete for worst pregnancy story ever! Below are some select few comments I have received either personally or via some article about me… I just wanted to rant a little today about this, maybe I am just grouchy because I thought I would have a baby by now but she seems to have become content again and is just chilling out uncomfortably in my belly still! I did find a swing-set today and spend a while swinging to try to get her to make her way out, highly suggested! Centripetal force is a great thing and I DARE you not to smile while swinging!
Also, just want to mention, it is ok to just be supportive of others and their ideas, whether that is a lifestyle choice or any thoughts about how their child should be born, or raised… unless it directly affects you or you are asked an opinion it is totally ok to not offer one! If one more person criticizes me or calls me crazy/insane for wanting a natural, un-medicated child birth, or has some unfounded opinion about co-sleepers I am going to snap… there are MANY reasons to do things in whatever way makes sense to you, mostly to benefit the child… no one sets out on the journey of life to make as many mistakes as possible… people have different life experiences and it is TOTALLY ok if people have different opinions than you, really! (I know most of my readers know this that is what makes this just a rant…)
Now to the fun stuff you get to look forward to if you’re interested in a tiny house of your own one day! BTW, I recently learned that those who are transitioning away from their tiny houses into other stages of life are criticized as well for doing so! Just a warning, I get sarcastic and snarky back at the dumb comments… it’s not meant to insult anyone unless you happened to write one of these… believe me, I GET that tiny won’t work for everyone for a variety of reasons… I don’t have anything but support for those of you with different life choices, I just don’t always appreciate the opinions dished out to me… I think it is important to know that this is the sort of stuff you get to hear, sometimes from surprisingly close friends and family. Just because you think tiny houses are a good idea you won’t always be meant with the same enthusiasm from others, be tough, be confident and forge forward knowing you’re not alone and there are plenty of other ‘crazies’ like myself that are happy to help navigate the path with ya! 🙂
Real life quotes, from the ‘experts’ about me…
“Can’t say that I would trust a woman to build a structure to live in. Structural integrity isn’t in most women’s thought process. They are good at interior decorating.” (my favorite, sexism is alive and well folks!)
“Love what she did! But she must get some great alimony to afford it. “ (I don’t even know what this means, I can’t do this without the continued support of a man?? FYI I get NO alimony, I make more money than my ex husband ever did – who has NOTHING to do with this project in the least anyway)
“Pregnant before marriage?? Children need and want a father. The child will hate you and your life will be hard” (This one is just weird and assumes quite a lot, first off, her father WILL be a part of her life… marriage, contrary to popular belief is NOT what makes a healthy relationship – trust, communication, shared values… those are stronger tells in my opinion, oh, and kindness, which this comment is NOT!)
Great idea! I think I’ll get knocked up (without being married) by some dude who apparently is no longer in the picture and then move into a micro home with the worst possible size of dog (a Great Dane) and a baby on the way. Smart! Now I can see why she’s not a successful architect. And since she had to deal with a “messy foreclosure” apparently she’s not that good with money either. Talk about making poor life decisions.
(Just wow again, one thing a lot of people lack is kindness, it seems a lot of them have the religious married thing down though, and then they wonder why I am turned away by it…hmmm, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar… again, just a lot of hateful assumptions that are not founded and could be disclaimed with the slightest bit of looking (here
– top three google searches for ‘best apartment dogs’ all of which mention Danes… my website chronicles everything else, some people would rather spew such hate though that even just keep it to themselves let alone being nice… I don’t understand it, without a thick skin these things are hard to take though… again, none of this is true, especially the poor life decisions thing… I have made some pretty great ones that I am proud of… and I would guess that I am far more financially ‘sound’ than this guy… but that’s just a guess…)
“If this is the best she can come up with she owes her mommy and daddy a lot of money back for her wasted education” (Ummm, I paid for my own college… and graduated debt free, with a masters degree at 22 because of scholarships received and working full time…)
“Liberal trash, this is what is wrong with our country, this is the new ‘success'” (ummm, I don’t even know what to say to this one, I would need more explanation…)
“I would hate to be invited to a dinner party at this house…” (something you’ll never need to be worried about :))
“It’d be the first to go in a tornado……” (I have heard this literally hundreds of times… its sure a good thing we don’t get many tornadoes in the rocky mountains! I wonder though, the wheels WOULD make it the first one to roll away from danger…)
“Geez lady. Nice idea about the house and saving money..bad idea about hooking up with a broke loser whose baby you will have but who can’t marry you and provide a normal sized home so your kid doesn’t live like a gnome. If you can’t provide a good environment for children..then use birth control and don’t subject them to living like this. Grow up people!” (It couldn’t possibly be a choice that is just different than yours?? I am well versed on birth control, I am 30 years old… This is however one of the ONLY comments read that even considered it could be a deadbeat dad… all of the others pegged me as a bitchy hussy that couldn’t keep a man… I thought that was interesting…)
“She should make things right and put a ring on his finger” (this made me laugh, I would think these ‘traditionalists’ would stick to traditions, its now MY obligation to put a ring on his finger AND build the house?? (: )
“Harsh as I may be on comments, I’m being nice. As a mother of 4 that is not suitable for a child and a dog. If he cared, he wouldn’t want you or his child to live there.” (Hmmm, he wouldn’t want me/us to live well within our means so we can spend time raising our kid and saving money to get out of the rat race so we can move onto bigger and better things in life than the 9-5 grind to pay continuous bills? I’m afraid if he didn’t also agree and hold similar values he would have never had the opportunity to knock this hussy up, we have made a lot of great choices together, intentionally, it is not a series of mistakes… this is not an accident and our daughter will be well taken care of 🙂 and also, I think my life is better than yours… )
“Actually, a man could have done it for half that.
Use corrugated metal for the exterior siding.
Forget the windows, no sink, toilet is hole in floor.
Shower at the gymn. Sleep with somebody else.
Cook with a microwave.
Don’t get pregnant.” (this sounds like a lovely abode… I have no idea why this hinges on a man or woman… but yes, there ARE different design styles…)
“Your “Great Dane” looks to me more like a (blue), non-tail-docked weimaraner than a Great Dane. Does he have any dew claws? What color are his eyes? Amber by chance? High activity and high intelligence are both characteristics of weims and Denver surely looks to me to be a weim rather than a Great Dane. Plus a Great Dane would be taller at the withers.” (I just feel SO enlightened, I should have called this guy instead of the breeder! BTW, MOST dogs have dewclaws unless they’ve been removed… and dogs are also generally a little smaller than full grown at 5 months… and also, ‘blue’ dogs of any breed have amber eyes, it is part of the gene that mutates their color…)
“First let me say bravo for her trying to save money! BUT….I can tell this lady doesn’t have a clue about having a baby at home. Where is the baby crib supposed to go? How about a high chair or play pen? It is so narrow and such tight quarters in her home. I don’t even see where the baby would crawl around. I can’t imagine a screaming baby in such a confined space. No place to take a few minutes for yourself. I think she will realize she needs more space after her baby is born.” (Oh my! How were kids ever raised before playpens and high chairs! I wonder if I can ever take her outdoors?)
“what an idiot” (that’s all this one is… ha!)
“I see problems.
Her TV is not visible from the chair she is pictured in, and its below eye level if she lays in bed and besides it would be sideways. At least it looks like a TV. IF its a computer, even more problematic. (Oh my, what am I do do without the most perfect and direct view of my TV???, it’s good I don’t watch it much… dodged a bullet there! I love that this is his FIRST concern…)
The “steps” shelves to get to the bed will be a real problem when her daughter begins to walk and climb. And when she does climb there is no way to prevent falling from moms bed which is 6 feet off the floor at least. (She built a house, I doubt she could understand how to build a rail…. which is actually 38″ from the ground… but would still hurt to fall from)
Where is the place for a baby crib? Can’t leave a crib sized baby sleeping on the King Size bed with the multi-foot drop off the edge. What do you do about bathing the baby when its too big for the kitchen sink and not yet big enough to enjoy “showers”. (first world problems, some people just sponge-bath, I am sure I will figure SOMETHING out… :)) I’m willing to bet this woman has NO EXPERIENCE with taking care of a small child even as a baby sitter if she really thinks this “home” can work for a toddler, pre-schooler. (because that was mentioned in the article, it is my retirement home…. you know…)
Note none of the pictures show the dog which should fill most of the floor space in either the living room or the kitchen corridor if it is inside. And does the dog get displaced when the baby starts to crawl or walk. Or will the baby just walk around and around the dog? (ummm, my dog is not 196 square feet… you’ll just have to trust me that this will work out…)
What is in those bags hanging off the bottom of the building. Is that the potable water or the “grey” water. In either case this wouldn’t work anyplace where the temps got down near the 32 degrees F. Its 20 below at my house today. And in those temps that exposed floor would lose a lot of heat too. (ummm those are tires… ha! it was -4 degrees HERE on that day… I did ok… amazing what a little planning and insulation can do!)
Might work for a recreational cabin where you expect to spend most of the day outside, but its a claustrophobic cabin fever episode waiting to happen if its an all winter northern “shelter” for mom and toddler, godzilla dog too.” (thanks for your ignorant ‘expert advice’, people, please don’t give too much credit to other peoples’ comments when they have no idea what they are saying, seems EVERYONE except other tiny house people think this is impossible, it isn’t I assure you, it is very possible and very comfortable… fooy to these people and those like them…)
“This is a single-wide trailer with wood siding – what’s the big deal? If this is the extent of this architect’s imagination and skill I can understand why she lives in a trailer.” (yeah…)
“Has any one given any thought to WHERE exactly this BABY will be sleeping eating and where all its stuff will go?! Seems pretty impractical for a grown woman A GIANT DOG and a BABY all at the same time … and what about daddy when things move forward?!” (Oh my, I TOTALLY forgot to think about those things! Where will all her STUFF go! and my stuff, and dads stuff! yeah… ummm we aren’t driven by our need for ‘stuff’, hence this works for us… I think she missed the point… )
“Like I said, not! Talk about a reality check. She has not been a MOMMY before. Wish her the best of luck, Bet the man goes before the dog!” (I refuse to be a mommy like you if you can’t make the first couple years work in a space like this… way to be supportive of other mommies though… )
“11,000 dollars for that? Bwahahaha! Somebody got robbed!”followed immediately by “there is NO way she built that for only 11,000 dollars the trailer alone would cost half of that” (I’ve come to realize that some people have no concept of the value of a dollar…)
“After looking at the gallery there is NO room for a baby. No room for a basinet or crib, changing table, swing, bouncy chair, no room for no baby Ms.Delusional!” (again, what ever will I do without a bassinet AND crib!)
“my gawd what has liberalism done to your hopes and dreams that you’d do this to yourself. haha” (um, this is not a political statement and I am certainly NOT a liberal…)
“I was really proud of this woman till I scrolled down and discovered she’s knocked up and that neither parent actually lives together. If you have to resort to building a house on a flatbed truck then how the Hell do you think you can afford a baby??” (it is not a ‘resort’…it is a very intentional decision… and I can ‘afford the baby’ with all that money I’m saving…)
“‘Babies don’t need a lot of stuff.’ HA! Spoken like someone without any children. After that baby comes, she’s going to wish she had space for a high chair, a playpen, and a walker. Not to mention all the bottles, feeding equipment, diapers, toys, etc. I think these tiny houses are a great idea but not for someone with an infant.” (yeah, I’m glad my daughter doesn’t have this person as a parent… )
“I hope she realizes that a play pen, baby crib, highchair, swing, pumpkin seat, potty chair, diaper storage, and bin plus toys and a stroller all take room. She better start adding on a room.” (it is amazing that people in our society see these things as NEEDs, they may be convenient but jeeze, needs? What the heck is pumpkin seat???)
“By the time she’s 8 months pregnant she’ll be living in a hotel, she won’t even fit in the kitchen anymore, let alone after the kid is born, this will NEVER work” (interesting… I can’t imagine wanting to be in a hotel instead of my house, especially now, being 9 months pregnant!…)
There are millions of people living in apartments across the country this small, there is NOTHING wrong or impossible about a well planned space this size, in any climate or situation. It’s ridiculous that to live in an independent structure this size takes SO much civil disobedience and is meant with so much ignorance from randoms in every corner… From some one who is actually doing it, not just criticizing it, it is not new or impossible in the least! It’s not even hard! I’ve been here nearly a year full time, in temperatures over 100 degrees and temperatures below zero… it IS possible, it DOES make financial sense if the lifestyle would suit you. If you are interested find your helpers and your support and research, research, research, ignore the nay-sayers, they infiltrate pretty close sometimes but just do your research enough to be confident in yourself and your decision. We all deal with these guys, they suck, you laugh and move on… Like Dave Ramsey says ‘If you can live like no one else, later you can live like no on else!”
Today I choose sarcastic!